Karen's Amazing Adventures: A day of contemplation

Today began very early (4 am) because we needed to leave by 5 to drive the hour to Gaborone. Refilwe was due to leave with about 35 of her classmates for 5 days in Durban, South Africa. We were almost late - one of her friends texted her to ask where she was, as the bus was about to leave. At least one additional student arrived after we did, and so she made it on the bus in time. Refi will return on Friday. They will be on the bus for 13 hours before reaching their destination. Anita and I agreed that our 13 hours on the airplane was better than 13 hours on a bus with 35 teens.

As we drove to a local Wimpy's and waited until 7 am for it to open to serve us breakfast, I began thinking about what has happened so far during this visit and why I still feel so uncertain as to where I am in Botswana.

Yesterday, my two nephews came to visit -

Oabone is 22 and Sedilame is 24. Both are employed and living on their own.

Sedilame brought his 3-year-old daughter, Anele, who is beautiful and shy.

It took a while for her smile and giggle to develop, but we soon saw a child who loves her father, her uncle and her aunt. She does not know Njale as well as there is estrangement between her and Sedilame. For a while in the morning, both boys helped Anita and Njale in the garden that is being created for a memorial to Brian.

Two young men from the village also were helping with the digging in the hard earth of the yard. Once the ground is broken it crumbles easily into sandy dark brown soil. It needs enrichment so plants grow faster and stronger, so Njale adds the compost purchased at the nursery yesterday. Anita is the consummate gardener and was more of an able helper than me. I tend to plant things quite haphazardly at home and do not take the time to develop a vision as Njale does. I cleaned and worked inside on the computer and doing dishes from lunch.

I was called outside to plant two small trees - one named Karen and the other named Jim. They will help shade the area that is being prepared for Brian's ashes. The family will gather again on Saturday morning around 6 am to spread his ashes and say our final good-byes.

Jim is straight up and strong, and Karen leans just a bit toward Jim for support.

When I look at these two young men and remember the children who rode the rides at Walt Disney World in 1996 during a holiday visit, I'm saddened a bit to have missed so much of their growing up. Would our relationship be different, of course, except I am still Aunt Karen to them and to their friends. Even Anita has become Aunt Anita to Refilwe's girl friends. I hope that the family gatherings that are happening because we are here will help strengthen this family at a time when they need each other more.

Anita with the family.

My brother-law's family -- Sedilame, Oabone, Njale, Refilwe, and Anele.

Me with my family.

It has occurred to me that all the paved roads that have appeared in the past 18 years have done much to change Botswana and the area between Gaborone and Moshupa. Where it used to take about 2.5 hours to make the trip over sandy, rough road, we can now get to and from the city in less than an hour depending on traffic. Where the roads were mostly single lanes with just enough room to get out of the way of the vehicle coming toward you, there are now passing lanes, turning lanes, stop lights, round-abouts, and many traffic signs (cow crossing, donkey crossing, walkways for humans, bus stop turnouts, speed limits, etc.).

Because the towns are more easily connected, the advertising has moved from the sides of the buildings and the front windows of the businesses to billboards that mar the landscape just as they do in the US. Where the dirt roads were bordered by curbs of dirt and stone and enclosed in scrub bushes and trees, there are now whole swatches of land were the scrub bushes and trees have been removed, and in many areas there are poles for electricity and telephone access to the villages.

For instance, Njale and Brian used to use propane and parifin for cooking and for the refrigeration of food. Now the refrigerator and freezer are electric and Njale is planning to replace her propane cook stove with an electric one because it is safer.

In Gaborone, on the main mall that bisected the downtown, individuals would set up tables and offer items for sale - everything from shoes to jewelry to food. I remember a day when we were walking the mall and Njale bought roasted ears of maize to eat from a stand as we walked along the way. The mall was open and along the edges were additional stores in buildings. The tallest building was about 5 stories and was the President Hotel where Jim and I stayed during part of our stay in 1990.

Now there are skyscrapers of 15-20 stories, and expensive housing enclaves with golf courses and gated entrances. We have visited several shopping malls that rival Columbia Mall or others of that vintage. Prices have risen, although the exchange rate against the dollar is more favorable for us than in 1990. And, instead of small stalls of sellers along the mall, there are whole groups of them at the bus stops that happen every 3-5 kilometers between Gaborone and Moshupa, and at most intersections through the city.

So what's the point of all this. Botswana is progressing and becoming more modern, and with it comes modern problems - the highest HIV/AIDS rate on the planet. Thus the Orphan projects that I spoke about in yesterday's post. There are billboards everywhere encouraging safe sex and ways to protect the family from this insidious disease.

Cultural patterns have not changed to make this an easy transition. Multigenerational housing and a still male-dominated hierarchy includes misuse of young girls. One of the children at the orphan project we visited has 3 children and she is 14. The country is receiving lots of help from other more progressive countries, and the government is trying to reeducate its citizens. There is a long way to go.

I see the beautiful country I visited in 1990. I see the generous and open people who were so welcoming in 1990. I see the possibilities that still exist for Botswana. And I see the years ahead that will still be difficult in ways we can not yet imagine.

So let me stop with these thoughts, and tell you about today. Njale, Anita and I spent much of our morning traveling from computer company to computer company, starting with the two that Mr. Holly recommended for fixing the problem with my Palm. I fried the charger that I brought with me because the plug adaptor did not cut the amount of electricity enough.

When I spoke with Jim unexpectedly yesterday, he asked why I did not use the international charger he had purchased for me. Since I did not remember seeing this devise, I asked where it was. Jim told me it was still plugged in near the chair in the living room where I generally sit in the evenings. Since I had used the dining room table to collect all the stuff I was planning to take, I asked if he had moved it there, and for some reason I had moved it back. No, Jim admitted, it was still were he had put it.

So yesterday Jim began looking into sending it to me as quickly as possible. That proved futile and expensive - $200 at least and it would not arrive until the 26th. Jim also suggested going back to Mr. Holly to see if he could simply perform some electronic surgery and take the specialized tip that connects the Palm to the charging unit and attach the cord to the correct charging unit for this country's voltage.

Of course, we did not do this as soon as we reached Gaborone. Instead we went from place to place on the advice of each company we visited. Finally, we had no where to go except to Mr. Holly's store where within 15 minutes after speaking with Mrs. Holly and working with one of her technicians. my Palm was charging on their counter. It is continuing to charge here in Moshupa and should be fully charged soon.

I will make certain that it is fully charged when we leave Botswana, as we will be in Cairo for only a couple of days. Once we get to Cyprus, my sister will help me find the adaptor I might need to use the new plug on my Palm in her outlets. So for the time being, I will not be in withdrawal from my Palm addiction. Anita is very happy that my Palm is working, because I will not be the beast she expected to develop!

We visited Oodi Weavers outside Gaborone this afternoon. This is a small group of mostly older women who create original wall hangings and linens on old fashioned looms that they string themselves for each project. They make their own yarn with original dyes, and 'paint' pictured on the loom.

I purchased a table runner in 1990, but could not afford one of the folk art wall hangings. I was determined to bring one of these beautiful creations home this time. And I did.

The lady in the orange blouse is the weaver who created my selection. I stood watching her work on the piece pictured here, before choosing my purchase in another building.

I thank Anita for asking if the weaver could be identified. She was one of the weavers I stood and watched for the longest time in the weaving shed. Anita took a photo of me with her and her creation. Wait until you see it in our home.

Anita brought crocheted necklaces with beads that Njale wants to learn to make. (One necklace is the red one on the neck of the birthday girl in yesterday's blog entry.) So we spent part of our day going from craft store to craft store looking for the 'ribbon' yarn. Once we found it, we next visited a bead shop where Anita and Njale picked out some beads to use with the colors of yarn we purchased. They are working in the living room as I type this entry as Anita shows her how to crochet the necklace.

We are without TV, perhaps for the rest of the week, since Refilwe failed to teach any of us how to use the satellite system that brings programs into the house. We will see if one of the boys can come out to teach us. Otherwise, we may need to sit and talk each evening. Might be better than watching the Olympics!

Anita and I had hoped to add a brief visit to the Okavango Delta this week, and are disappointed that the opportunity is more than our checkbooks will allow. Njale has other activities planned with visits to other cities with museums and such, so I'm certain we will be fine. Next week the three of us will head off to Kasane in the northeast section of Botswana (for those of you who are looking at maps) where we will travel daily into the Chobe Game Preserve and spend one day at Victoria Falls in Zimbabwe before returning to Moshupa a couple of days before we leave for Cairo.

On the way home to Moshupa, we stopped outside the town to check on Njale's chicken farm. She and Brian had begun to develop the land planning it as a full time venture. It is waiting for Njale to continue working the land as soon as she gets Refilwe through school and into college. Anita and Njale are looking at the baobab tree Brian planted several years ago. Keep this baobab in mind as you work your way toward our visit to Victoria Falls and see a tree estimated at 1500 years old.